Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
Randomize
