I just remembered that last night when we tried to walk off the spins you said "pretend i'm your pet dinosaur" so i walked you around on an invisible leash while you made t-rex hissing noises.
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
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