I bet he comes in French.
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
Randomize