their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
My breath smells like gin and sadness
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
Randomize