I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
Randomize
