I can't tonight. I'm still nursing a beach sex injury. Don't wanna talk about it.
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Randomize
