I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
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