spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
Randomize
