if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
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