this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
My brother really should've known better than to make me go egg hunting with his daughter when I was entirely too drunk to do so. Threw up in a plant in front of her.
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
Randomize
