my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
When I masturbate I pretend my dick is the slap chop an I'm destroying vegtables. Do you think that's a eating disorder?
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
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