Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
Randomize