Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
Are we still banned from the library?
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
Randomize
