Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
i just woke up from a 4 hour nap, still drunk, to make mac n cheese.
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