At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
I donkey kicked that mother fucker. Never stood a chance.
It was a door. A completely inanimate object, of course it didn't stand a chance you idiot.
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
Randomize
