that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
Randomize