my soul wont recognize me after tonight
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Randomize