WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
stop changing my ringtone to people fucking, it looks bad at work
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
I need water and some morals
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
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