she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Randomize