no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
Dude he downed 9 shots of tequila, sang bohemian rhapsody with 3 randoms Wayne's world style, solo'd closing time, chased the hot bartender's dog all the way to main, tackled him, carried him back, hot bar tender hugged AND kissed him, then he does a jumping heel click and leaps into my car through the window. Next rounds free at the yeti. Needless to say your little brother is a tequila god.
Basically.
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Randomize
