dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
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