White coat. Heels.
All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
So we hooked up and then instead of texting me, he endorsed me on LinkedIn for Microsoft Word a few days later
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
Randomize
