Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
Dude, just walked by a homeless guy pissing on the sidewalk while he was screaming at his wang. God, I love this city.
omg this kid i'm babysitting is making a penis out of playdough ahhhh.
He just rolled me a 'baby penis' as opposed to his 'big boy' penis that he crafted...he just demanded that I roll him a penis.
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
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