I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
Randomize