scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
You don't know being judged until its 7:30 in the morning and you're on 2 hours of sleep halfway between drunk and hungover wearing pajama pants at an international airport while saying how proud you are that you found the airport's bar immediately and how disappointed you are that it's closed
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
Randomize
