You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
Randomize
