Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
I'm eating cold pizza from work and drinking beer from a wine glass trying to decide if I want to shower or just rub one out and go to sleep. How have I ever gotten laid?
Because you're really hot before taking the time to actually get to know you.
Randomize
