This dress was meant to end up on your floor
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
Randomize
