Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
I just ate a drumstick out of the garbage. I need a life coach.
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
Current dream situation- Gordon Ramsey is my Uber driver and he's hauling around a backseat filled with chocolate covered açai berries. I'm good for eternity.
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
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