I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
he told me I talked like a deaf person
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
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