I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
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