I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
Randomize
