whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
Don't EVER smell your tampon
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
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