she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
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