just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
He made me stop in the middle of giving him a blowjob so he could go get his glasses. because he "wanted to see". I need to stop dating nerds.
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
Randomize
