Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
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