you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
Randomize
