Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
The problem with adderall is that no matter what I'm doing, I feel like it was the most productive thing I've EVER done.
Did you alphabetize our spice cupboard again?
...You'll thank me later.
Randomize
