I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
Left my ID again and at a Giant's game. This is the second time they accepted my handgun safety certificate as proof of ID to buy beer.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
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