Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
Randomize
