there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
All of my Tinder matches have neck tattoos. It's like God wants me to go to jail again.
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Randomize
