i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Randomize