Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
he told me I talked like a deaf person
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
Randomize
