So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
my being single is dangerous.
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
Randomize
