awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
Please tell me how you drunkenly remembered your social security number when we were checking you into the ER.
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
FUCK WHALES
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
Randomize
