It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
Randomize
