apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
Church boner. Awkwardddd
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
Randomize
