just got waxed at a place I havent been to in a while
woman didnt remember me then in the middle of waxing she announced that she just didnt recognize my face
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
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