you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
Randomize
