Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
Hungover at Subway, watching a business guy try to squeeze his way past my car to get into his. Bitch shouldn'ta parked over the line.
You truly are a temple of morality.
I am the night, I am justice, I am currently watching the fat biz guy pay a frat boy to back his car up for him so he can get in.
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
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